[ASHA UPDATE] Tantrum Asha : Day 2

Malam ini lagilagi harus fight dl sama Asha biar dia mau tidur tepat waktu. Jadi, sejak bangun dr tidur siang, sekitar jam 2.oo pm, Asha blm mau bobo sore. Biasanya dia bobo sore lagi sekitar jam 4.oo atau jam 5.oo pm. Nah ini bablas keasikan main. Baru tidur pas magrib. Saya kira dia akan trs tidur sampe pagi. Taunya dia bangun sekitar isya. Daaann minta keluar.

Asha di bawa mbah cilik dn mbah ndutnya main2. Padahal Asha udh ngantuk dn nguap melulu, tp waktu saya mau ambil dia dr gendongan mbah nya, Asha menolak saya. Dia balik badan dn peluk mbah nya kuat2, membelakangi saya. Bener2 deh, kayanya dia tau klo ibunya dateng pasti artinya dia disuruh tidur, dan dia blm mau tidur masih pengen main.

Setelah keberapa kali saya berusaha ambil dia dr gendongan mbah, akhirnya dia mau jg saya gendong. Tp sambil dialihin perhatiannya dgn cerita macem2. Mau nenen, tp sebentar2. Trs mulai deh tantrumnya. Asha mulai nangis krn kesel dipaksa tidur pdhl masih pengen main. Saya biarin Asha nangis, sambil saya belai kepalanya dn bilang berkali, "udah malem, asha harus bobo, udh ngantuk". Berharap bs jadi afirmasi buat dia. Asha trs nangis sambil nendang2 saya. Sedih liatnya, kaya lg disiksa aja :( Tapi saya harua disiplin sama dia. Ibu saya sampe nengok, knp ko Asha nangis melulu.

Ga sampe 15 menit, akhirnya dia nyerah juga dn mulai mau nenen. Ga lama, Asha pun tidur. Tuh kan sebenernya dia udh ngantuk, tp keras kepala pengen main melulu. Kalo keinginannya diturutin, bisa2 jam 11.oo pm dia baru tidur. Tadi alhmdlh, Asha tidur jam 9.oo pm lewat dikit.

Ternyata di umur segini Asha udh mulai punya kemauan sendiri. Mulai keras kepala. Skrg harus adu kuat siapa yg hrs in charge. Tentu orang tuanya. Walau ga mudah, orangtua harus menunjukkan powernya pada anak bahwa ga setiap keinginan anak harus dituruti. Maaakk..tiba2 jadi inget reality shows The Nanys! Ternyata ga gampang jadi orangtua.

Asha sayang, maafin ibu yaa bikin kamu kesel lagi malam ini. Maafin ibu yaa udh bikin kamu nangis. Ibu mau Asha belajar disiplin. Asha ga boleh tidur terlalu malam. Kalo Asha mau main kan bs besok pagi. Ibu selalu sayang Asha. Kita berjuang bersama yaa nak. Saling bekerjasama menjadi tim yg kompak. Ayah, ibu, dan Asha. Semoga fase tantrum Asha ga lama2 yaa. Asha kembali menjadi anak manis ayah dan ibu yg jarang nangis yaa.

Love you little angel :*

XOXO

[ASHA UPDATE] Tantrum Asha

Asha is a very sweet baby. Since she was born she only cries for two reasons, either she's sleepy or hungry. My family and the neighborhood always told me that they never heard Asha crying. Such a sweet baby, they said.

Until several days ago, in her 13+m age, she had tantrum. In this age she likes to walk *by gripping my hands* around the house during the day and night. At night when she missed her sleep time at 07.oo pm and still walking around the house, that would lead into her tantrum. She would awake until 10.oo pm and didn't want to sleep, she even refused to breastfed. If i forced her to stay in bed, she would cry, and asked to go out the bedroom. While i knew that she was sleepy and tired, but she refused to sleep.

Since we stayed in Bandung for this past 3 weeks, so everytime Asha crying, my aunty, my mom, they took Asha from bed to stop her from crying. Asha would ask them to walk her again, or to play with her again and again though she was sleepy and tired. Until finally they gave her back to me at 11.oo pm, when she already very sleepy and tired.

My little baby sleeps at 11.oo pm sounds not right for me. Because her normal sleep time is at 7.oo or 8.oo pm.

So last night, i forced her to stay in bed. It was 10.oo pm already and she didn't want to sleep or stay in bed. Then she had tantrum. She cried and refused to breastfed. She cried for no reason, i knew. She was just lying there and crying. She was very upset that she kicked me and cried. I tried to comfort her, but she kept kicking me. So i just lying on her side, let her threw all her emotion out. It was about 10-15 minutes she cried like that, until finally she looked tired. That was the time i offered her breastfed, and she accepted me happily. In a minute, she was slept.

Fyuuhh..what a night.

I guess it is important to keep the sleep time right on schedule. Maybe she will upset to me and begin to cry. Or worse, maybe she'll have tantrum. But hey, that's not bad to let my baby cry. I don't have to follow her every will. As a parent, i have to teach her discipline. And this is her first lesson to be discipline on her sleeping time.

Let's see tonight. Will i able to tame her tantrum again or not. Hopefully, she'll sleep on time so we don't have to fight.

Oh Asha, you're a toddler now...

XOXO

[NGOBROL] Stop Yelling And Mocking Your Child!

Mumpung ada mood nulis dn Asha bobo, mari lanjut postingan kedua di siang ini. Hehe..

Jadi, lingkungan di sekitar rumah (kontrakan) saya banyak anak2 kecil. Dari bayi baru lahir, 6 bulan, 9 bulan, 10 bulan (Asha), 11 bulan, 2 tahun, 4 tahun, 5 tahun, kelas 1 SD, ah pokonya banyak cilik2 disini. Nah saking banyaknya cilik2, jadi pada jam2 tertentu pas mereka pada berkeliaran main di jalan komplek pastilah jadinya rame.

Tetangga depan rumah saya punya dua anak, umur 4 tahun (cewe) dn 2 tahun (cowo). Tiaaapp hari tu anak dua berapa kali pasti dibentak2 sama emaknya, sama budenya, sama sepupunya yg kuliah, dn sama neneknya yg semuanya tinggal di rumah yg sama. Awal2 denger mereka bentak2 anak kecil, ngenes bgt. Apa ga bisa yaa ngomongnya baik2, ga usah teriak2. Ke anak sendiri loh. Pdhl anaknya jg ga bandel2 bgt loh menurut saya. Dan alhasil si anak itu nangiiiiss melulu tiap hari lebih dari tiga kali. Ya pagi siang sore malem.

Misalnya nih si anak cowo yg entah knp ga demen pake sandal dn lebih nyaman nyeker kemana2 selalu dibentak gini, Uwiiiiiiii pake sendal!!!!! Hiihhh awaas ya!!!! Dengan level teriakan yg diatas rata2.

Atau gini, Uwi minggir sana! Males banget deh gue sama lo! Kata si sepupu kuliah ke anak 2 tahun. Hellloooo...cara ngomong lu ke anak 2 tahun tuh yg bikin gue males dengernya! Greget sendiri deh dengernya.

Dalam hati saya berjanji kalo saya ga akan bentak2 Asha kaya gitu. Buat apa? Toh anak jg ga akan dengerin kita kalo kita bentak2 mereka.

Saya jadi salut sm mertua saya yg ga pernah sekalipun bentak de Hudan. De Hudan adlh adik bungsunya hubby yg skrg umurnya masih 3 tahun. Pdhl yaaaaaa...de Hudan super duper aktif dn ga bs diem. Saya yg liatnya aja stress klo dia acak2 rumah, lempar2 mainan, atau melakukan kebandelan2 lainnya. Tp bapak ibu ga pernah bentak ade. Hebat bgt. Kalo saya, kali udh jedotin kepala sendiri ke tembok ngadepin ade tiap hari. Hehe..

So what's the point of yelling to your kids? Nothing.

Dan makin parahnya disini adlh ibu2 tetangga yg ngajarin anak2 buat ngejek anak lain (lagi2 sasarannya uwi krn dia dianggap paling cengeng dn jadi objek penderita) dengan lagu yg begini bunyinya,

Sorakin uwi, WOOOOYY!!! Sekali lagi, WOOOOYYY!!! Mana orangnya, WOOOYYY!!!

That's just sick!!! Ko ngajarin anak kecil mocking temennya seakan2 itu biasa aja. Ih sumpah sebel bgt. Kalo Asha yg digituin, pasti saya udh sewot2. Siapa yg rela anaknya dimocking rame2? Absolutely not me!

Sungguh yaa ga guna bgt deh ngajarin anak kecil ejek2an. Cuma bikin si anak jd minder dn terus2an akan jadi objek penderita diantara temen2nya. Dan bikin anak yg ngejek ngerasa superior. Oh my God!

Anak adalah manusia kecil yg jg ingin dihargai, dimengerti, dn dipahami. Sama seperti org dewasa. Mereka jiwa2 kecil yg masih rentan. Yg msh harus dilindungi, dibina, disayangi. Bukannya malah dibentak dn diejek.

Ya Allah, saya memang blm sempurna menjadi ibu yg baik bagi Asha. Tapi semoga saya terhindar dr sifat suka membentak atau mengejek Asha.

Stop yelling and mocking your child.
Hug them and love them. That's all what they need.

XOXO